I am NOT a Life Coach (& You Don’t Need One Anyway)

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I’m not your typical “life coach”...

in fact, I don’t consider myself one at all!

Hell, I think I’ve confused Google enough on that matter already…so, let’s clarify!

Since 2014, I’ve coached in a lot of different ways. I’ve coached health and fitness. I’ve coached in general personal growth. I’ve coached in clarity. I’ve called myself a transformation coach. I’ve called myself a trainer and I’ve forrayed into time management and productivity…

But I’m none of those things.

1

I am not a health coach…

When I started coaching in 2014, I got my start working with a network marketing company - Beachbody, which you may have seen me post about. I got into it because I knew I needed accountability and the more work I did and the better results I had, the more I wanted to share it.

But in doing health coaching, I was introduced to personal growth. One of the greatest gifts my time with my NLM gave me was how much they reinforced daily reading of personal development as a vital behavior. And it opened a new world to me. It opened the world of coaching as a larger profession.

But I’m not a health coach. I could care less how much you workout, what size pants you are, what diet you follow, or how many inches you lose - if any. I don’t care about any of that. I care about the vitality you have for your life.

2

I’m not a career coach…

Don’t let the job burnout and stress management moniker fool you - I’m not a career coach. Do a lot of my clients end up making career pivots as a result of working with me? Yes, absolutely. But the reason why they make those pivots is because they gain a greater clarity on themselves and what they actually want in their lives.

I’m not a career coach because - honestly - I could care less what field my clients are working in. I don’t know that any of us do care about that. I think we care about how our work makes us feel. I think we care about if our careers fill us up or drain us.

My goal? To help my clients make changes to their career that give them that fulfillment.

I get the confusion though. So much of what I talk about and what I do has to do with our work. But, honestly, is it really that surprising? Of our 24-hours in a day, most of us are spending 33-50% of our time working - depending on how crazy your work schedule is. It’s no wonder that the vast majority of burnout people feel is the result of their job.

No, I’m not a career coach because I’m not coaching people on how to “find their passion”, “find a new job”, “be more successful”, or even on how to “move up the ladder" in their work. Honestly, I don’t believe in that because so many of us have it in their heads that by doing these things they’re going to somehow “fix” their life or flip a switch and suddenly be more fulfilled. But that’s not how it works.

If anything, I help them create a lifestyle in their jobs that shows them that what they have now can fulfill them if only they change the habits, behaviors, and boundaries that they’ve been operating under.

So, no, I’m not a career coach.

3

I’m not a life coach, either…

Honestly, I operated under this label for a while. I called myself a transformational life coach, but, honestly, what the fuck does that even mean? Seriously!

Even when you look up the definition for it something along the lines of “wellness professional”…or “help clients improve their relationships, careers, and day-to-day live” comes up.

Honestly, I can speak from experience when I say it’s code for bullshit. It’s code for “I don’t actually know what I do or who I help, so anything you throw at me I can help you with,” which really isn’t true.

I’ve joked for a long time that if someone came at me with financial or relationship struggles (especially romantic relationships), I wouldn’t be able to feel good about taking them on as a client. Those are not my areas of expertise. I wouldn’t - in alignment with my integrity and my conscience - be able to take their money.

Perhaps the best definition I’ve ever seen for a life coach was something along the lines of “action-oriented mentor” or “goals coach”. I definitely think that’s in line with what I do.

But, coaches also should not be telling you what to do. They should be guiding you toward your goals. But what if you don’t know what your goals are? Or your goals have been consistently running you into the ground? And what if you’re too stubborn to see that you’re on the road to disaster?

No. I don’t think I’m a life coach. it’s too broad. Too much of a generalist. It’s too mamby-pamby. And I get it - I’ve been there.

My coaching philosophy maybe very holistic, but it’s more purposeful than that.

this is what I am…

i’m a burnout + Stress management coach!

I’m grateful for all the ways that my career as a coach has meandered over the last couple years because I finally feel like I know who I am and who I serve. I finally know that the place where self-care, personal clarity, time management, productivity, and all the shit I’ve dabbled in come together is here: under the umbrella of burnout.

Because here’s the real talk…

You don’t need a health coach.

You don’t need someone to come in and tell you what to eat or how often to workout or how much weight to lift - unless you’re going into professional bodybuilding. Because for us normal people, that’s a bandaid solution masking your greater need. Hell, be real with yourself - your goal isn’t to be a six-packed beast anyway.

Your goal is to have enough energy to chase your kid or your nephew. Your goal is to have enough vitality at the end of the day to be present in your relationships or work on your personal passions. Your goal is to be less physically burned out…am I right?

You don’t need a life coach.

You don’t need someone to come in and tell you “this is how you get to your goal”. You’re a fucking goal-getter, my friend. You don’t need that. As soon as you’re given the plan, you’ve got this, don’t you?

No, what you need is someone to come in and audit your life, clear out the crap, call you out on your bullshit excuses, and help you create the boundaries that you’ve been too stubborn to set in the first place. The boundaries that will give you the time and the energy to work that game plan you made in the first place.

You need someone who can help you look at your life, trim the fat, and build habits and routines that fill you up, not add to your burnout.

you don’t need a career coach, either.

Because - honestly - your career is probably fine to begin with. It just doesn’t feel fine because you’re too busy people-pleasing, perfecting, and running yourself ragged on that hamster wheel of your corporate hustle to remember two very important things:

  1. That you’re a human being, not a human doing.

  2. That - just like they have you do on airplanes - you need to give yourself permission to put your oxygen mask on first.

So, there you have it...

I soapboxed way harder than I meant to, but I felt like - for the sake of not confusing Google and, more importantly, not confusing you - I needed to clarify who I am, what I do, and why I do it.

But I also wanted to remind you about who you are and what you need. Because there are a lot of shiny objects being marketed to you day-in and day-out and I’m here to help you put burnout at the forefront. Because for you and your personality, fixing that is priority #1!

Ellyn | Burnout Coach & Speaker

Helping overwhelmed high-achieving women in business to work less and live more. Since 2017, I’ve become a burnout and stress management specialist and expert helping clients to create more sustainable routines, more supportive systems, and the clarity and fulfillment they want in their lives so that they can finally heal from their hustle and take back their lives. As a former research scientist myself, I bring a healthy dose of evidence-based strategies to the notion of burnout. I’m a certified coach, have multiple stress certifications, am a certified Hell Yes podcast guest, and am a Senior Contributor for Brainz Magazine. Hiya!

https://coachellyn.com
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