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Summary

In this episode, I sit down with Jillian Rigert to explore her journey of self-discovery and authenticity. We dive into the pressures that often lead us away from our true passions and discuss the importance of giving ourselves permission to pivot when something no longer aligns. We also touch on the challenges of perfectionism, people-pleasing, and the fear of failure that many high achievers face. Jillian shares her experiences with identity shifts and how embracing her true self led to greater fulfillment and genuine connections.

For full show notes, head to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠coachellyn.com/podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and, of course, follow me on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠OR check out my ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube Channel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for more!

Keywords

authenticity, societal pressures, permission to pivot, self-discovery, values, passions, people-pleasing, perfectionism, fear of failure, high achievers, guilt, shame, belonging, authenticity, career pivots, societal expectations, values, identity shifts, self-awareness, self-trust, control, decision-making, military, eating disorder, genuine connections

Some Takeaways

• Give yourself permission to pivot and pursue what aligns with your authentic self.

• Societal pressures and expectations can lead us astray from our true passions and values.

• High achievers often struggle with people-pleasing, perfectionism, and the fear of failure.

• Embracing authenticity and letting go of guilt and shame is essential for personal growth.

• Finding a sense of belonging comes from being true to oneself and surrounding oneself with supportive people. Stepping into one's authentic self often requires challenging societal expectations and conforming to one's own values.

• Identity shifts can be destabilizing, but it's important to remember that worthiness is not tied to career titles or achievements.

• Self-awareness and self-trust are crucial in navigating career pivots and making decisions based on the present moment.

• Focusing on what can be controlled and accepting the uncertainty of the future can lead to a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

• Genuine connections and relationships are more valuable than external markers of success.

Sound Bites

"I made it my mission to help others learn these lessons before they get to the place where they don't have time to change."

"I'm finally getting back to what I actually thought was my authentic desire which was to become a therapist. So why not start now?"

"I constantly was striving for external validation, mostly by people close to me, and I never could do enough."

"What are some of the things as you started emerging from this, stepping more into your authentic self, doing these things that felt like they were infinitely more aligned with who you should have been this entire time, what did that look like?"

"I'm so glad I joined the Air Force. I really loved it. And I think I could have found a place where I was, you know, the healer as part of the mission."

"Control the controllables, but be able to really feel the human experience, which is a whole spectrum of emotions."

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Connection

03:23 The Permission to Pivot

05:12 Struggles with People-Pleasing and Perfectionism

09:08 The High Achiever's Dilemma

12:14 Sacrificing Authenticity for External Validation

15:23 Letting Go of Guilt and Shame

21:22 Embracing Authenticity

23:15 Finding Alignment in Career Choices

28:39 Control and Embracing the Human Experience

31:13 The Power of Genuine Connections

About Jillian Rigert, DMD, MD Life & Leadership Coaching

In Jillian’s Words…

I hustled myself into exhaustion, seeking worthiness and enoughness through my achievements which never filled the void within. I fast-tracked my way into the military to become an oral and maxillofacial surgeon. While in residency, I realized the path I had paved for myself was not sustainable for my well-being - but who was I without my career? I felt trapped and unable to quit - while also unable to stay. Ultimately, I risked my career to save my life. After my third year of oral surgery residency and completing medical school, I transitioned out of surgery and into oral medicine followed by 1.5 years as an assistant clinical professor in hospital-based dentistry then three years as a research fellow in Radiation Oncology. Pivot by pivot, I have found my way back to myself and to a career path I love, and now I help others to do the same.  

Coaching helped me to get back into the driver's seat of my life to create a life true to myself. Now, I live it to give it, and help others to create a fulfilling life true to themselves, grounded in self-compassion, unwavering worthiness and knowing that they are "enough" independent of their achievements. 

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